Profound Musings on Work

Lately, I've gotten a lot of compliments at work. "You're awesome," "You're so nice," "I don't know what we would do without you." Well, you understand. The problem is, unlike most people, I hate these compliments. You see, I'm all about being a combative contrarian a la Christopher Hitchens or H.L. Mencken or Sinbad. So I'm pretty fed up with all these hussies at the law firm trying to get on my good side. I'm not going to sleep with you, so I don't know why you would be nice to me. Hopefully, some of the newer writers on this website will agree with that statement! I mean, God isn't necessarily some old white man with a flowing beard, he could be a rock or a zoologist. Come on! Expand your minds people, but once you do expand those craniums don't forget the important stuff. Take pragmatism for instance. Now I suspect that I might have some supporters for pragmatism on this website (especially the guy who said he enjoys Eliot's non-Wasteland work--you're probably all about Sweeney Among the Nightingales, you know, the anti-Semitic stuff). We all know that ideas like truth, reason, science and virtue fade away pretty rapidly in the postpostmodern freakfuck world. Read some Paul Feyerabend fer crissakes! In the end, it's all about the journey, the liberal bourgeois democracy, and harmonious discord not the benjamins, a robot plutocracy and holy day vespers.